Living within my own skin.


It’s Sunday morning, rainy, gloomy…just the way I like it. Don’t mind me, I just rather have it that way. Sunny days, clear blue skies, is something that just doesn’t sit right with me. I rather have the weather consistent of a hurricane, without the aftermath of one, of course. But, it’s where I feel the most comfortable. All doom and gloom, like my personality I guess. Currently, sitting in my kitchen, having my morning cup of coffee and staring Jesus’ “Last Supper” portrait and look to His left, then to His right, and recall the stories of all His apostles and their journeys, to that present spot of being at the “Last Supper”, and find myself thinking, how could such a point in time, really have taken place. Now, I’m not contradicting or trying to find out another solution to what could have been. But, it just seems fair, to be able to question ourselves and how we fit into all of this mystery. When I find myself pondering how or why, I just look to the rear of my apartment, and glance to the tall trees and the withering leaves, and gives me the concrete fact, that He is behind all of it. It truly is fascinating to contemplate where we fit and how we can better understand how He works. 

It’s the spiritual warfare of my life. If I want to see the works of Satan, I’ll just turn on the morning news or the national news, and something horrific is going on, and it’s obvious who is being all the hatred on the mass scale that is shown. We are all capable of wrong-doing, hatred, and vengeance, but to the scale of severing heads is something beyond comprehension. I have lost all faith in humanity, well to be perfectly honest, I’ve lost it for many, many years. But, their seems to be some souls out their, especially on this site, that still have faith, and that’s a good thing. Only so much can happen, before we start to question, when is the hostility going to subside. I know I do. The evermore reason, to be an introvert. To not be a sociable extrovert, and perhaps, put oneself in a drastic situation, that can conclude in harm or worse. Anything can happen at anytime, granted! But, to knowingly put oneself in an unknown situation, just for fun, excitement or what have you, is just redundant. 

This is just a fraction of what I think of, and ponder and thankful that I’m not a gregarious person. I get sometimes get startled, when the phone rings, or when a handful of people are within arms length, for the thought of confrontation or the sound of an unreasonable outburst of anger pours into the room because of one’s political views, or didn’t like the outcome of a game…It’s just not worth it to me, to mingle or be in the same company of people that get distraught by things of such nature. I’d rather be alone, within my comfy space, with my furry PoPo, and a full-battery for my laptop, my iphone as a back-up, and people that have the same interests that I do, which is this…blogging, and writing our lives away, to show that this type of mentality, being it’s not only me, but many others, as well. 


About luis castillo

An introvert who enjoys reading, writing and journal entry and recently picked up iphoneography along the way. My "Walls of Solitude" is my sanctuary and where most, if not all of my writings scream through my fingertips.
This entry was posted in All Writings and tagged , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s