I Look Down While Satan Looks Up

It doesn’t take much. I’m ashamed of it and it bothers me to the core of my being. It is with great pains that I inhabit this flaw, that I call ANGER! It is one of many flaws that takes control of the majority of us, results may vary. But, for me, it comes like a thunder strike. First the rumble, then BAM! I am an introvert because I have to be, but thankfully it comes naturally, for if not, I would never be cut out for the extrovert lifestyle, or I would have been in prison many years ago. In my younger years, I’ve tried to stifle my anger, thinking it would suffice, however, it only made it worse. For those that try to stifle their aggression, should know what happens next. I’ve learned to contemplate my aggression, but to a degree before it’s the pandemonium of Satan unleashed. It painfully hurts when the anger is far from my control, so I pray, but honestly, Satan wins most of the time. To paint the picture, it is Satan and I, with a short leash, but with a sonorous voice together with power, but no endurance. Like the Tyson of old, I would only last so much before I can’t handle it anymore.

I’ve become a misanthrope. I cannot stand humankind anymore than I can throw them, which isn’t far. It is a horrible way to live, and dealing with it, has become my normal way of life, though, it isn’t normal. I’ve met people that have phobias, but not like this. I can only see a handful of people that I personally know, but the rest is from afar. It is anything but bewildering, just overwhelmingly insane, and that’s putting it nicely. My exterior may seem normal, but I am pure cerebral one hundred percent of the time.

I am very serene, but very dangerous under the wrong circumstances. I endure my frailties to the best of my abilities, the rest, I write about. Anger has definitely been the catalyst of my downfall in life. The slightest grimace toward me brings out destruction, as a trouncing is soon to follow. I am a God fearing man, who is captured by Satan and does not want to let me go. It is in classical music that I dwell into most of the time, but feel Satan breathing down my neck, so I know he isn’t as far as I want him to be. I am the unleashed pandemonium in a box that paces all four corners of the room.


About luis castillo

An introvert who enjoys reading, writing and journal entry and recently picked up iphoneography along the way. My "Walls of Solitude" is my sanctuary and where most, if not all of my writings scream through my fingertips.
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